9. I won't be able to compare the Bolshoi Opera House with the Palladium in Carmel.
8. I'll never learn the Russian name for our dog Hoosier.
7. I won't be able to ski on the slushy slopes of Sochi.
6. I won't be able to buy Marsha a Russian mink coat for Christmas.
5. I won't be able to counsel Duma members on how to say no to a President.
4. I'll have to cancel my tennis match with Maria Sharapova.
3. I won't be able to compare Russiaville, IN with Russia.
2. I won't be able to see if borscht really does taste just like pork tenderloin.
1. Our summer vacation in Siberia is a no go.